Saturday, 7 September 2019

New beginning. New

So alhamdulillah today finally im back to the new semester.  New environment but just the same me, nothing new but hopefully new to more on the positive vibes.

Class for this semester begin this tuesday September 10th. So got to chill out this two days left . All the things ready, but need to buy more things as usual for the class. Yup i live in the new house too. New people around me . Maybe that is why i said new environment? 

When people ask me why I didn’t stick with the same people as to why im not living with the old housemates or why I didn’t stay around with people that’s same course or anything sorts of questions like these all . 

Well. I just like something new. I mean, i want to be surround with new people, I cannot just be with the same people even though how much i love certain same people, i just i want to try something new. I think i like new things and just see how that gonna turns out to be. Cant help the nervous/paranoia/trust issue/expectations to be left out but that is what i want to push away from. 

Admit it though. I am scared, idk. Nervous i think? Even i loves being alone and prefer being like a survivor, i just can’t help the feelings of fear. I sometimes can’t figure what I’m most afraid of, thought i know but I can’t want to know or even let it slide in my mind i know i just need to push it out. 

Because i know, everything is never going to be easy, i just have to and will come thru it, and most of all i know i can handle them and i will. 

4.08am, september 7th.